Million Dollar Beach House follows a group of swanky realtors who try to sell some of the biggest and best properties available in the Hamptons, while also manoeuvring through the hurdles of their life.
I am really enamoured by reality TV, not because I think it’s all true, because, let’s be real, it is not. But because the drama in those shows is astounding and it’s really entertaining to watch. With a name such as this, you’d expect Million Dollar Beach House to have more things driving it forward. However, it’s just another show that’s petty and, well, features some pretty houses.
Okay, before I get too into it, let’s first introduce the people here. At the Nest Seekers International, we have Jimmy, who’s the top salesperson and thus we don’t get to see him much, Michael, who is a former model and his only character trait seems to be that he is going to be a father, Peggy, the only woman who gets some amount of light and loves the drama, Noel, who usually comes off as disrespectful and J.B., who thinks he deserves a promotion for some reason.
So, coming back to the story, there’s nothing much. The five try to sell as many properties as possible over the summer, while also battling their personal problems. However, these problems seem so fake and petty most of the time that you feel more annoyed than entertained. The properties, although gorgeous, don’t really catch your attention a whole lot either. However, what is probably the most infuriating thing about the show is its conflicts.
It feels like some conflicts were just manufactured to make the show interesting, which was a total failure. There’s a tension between Peggy and Noel since the first episode which never really gets resolved for 6 episodes and they just brush it under the carpet. I mean, there’s an entire sequence in a yacht where they all gather to solve it, but the team does it so horrendously that I wanted to leave the job even though I didn’t work there. Additionally, there’s also a very public fight infront of clients regarding this petty fight which gave me second-hand embarrassment.
Even with the fights, these are some of the most terrible characters I have witnessed in a series. At one point, Michael says that he shouldn’t have to buy his pregnant wife a push present (whatever that is) because, although she’s been carrying a baby for 9 months, he’s been carrying the sperm for way longer. I honestly had nothing to say because I was so baffled.
Okay, coming to the real-estate. For someone who has no idea about houses, I loved the houses. They were magnificient, big, sleek and beautiful. However, Million Dollar Beach House took away from the dealings and the houses in general with the way the interpersonal conflicts crept into it. Also, most often than not, the clients seem to know more about the properties than the agents, which is just embarrassing. I don’t know if they wanted it to be funny, because it most definitely was not.
However, I will give it though, although the show is (obviously) glamourized, I felt it kind of (and that’s a big kind of) encompasses how real realtors would behave. Because, I mean, if my co-worker talked behind my back, I’d be really angry as well. Now, would I bring it up infront of important people who will pay my commission? Probably not.
Summing up: Million Dollar Beach House
Million Dollar Beach House gets a lot wrong. After a while, the issues become so trivial and silly, especially because they don’t get addressed properly, that it weighs the series down. There’s a lot that they tried to do with the show. However, it really didn’t work in their favour at all. Million Dollar Beach House, thus, is kind of a let-down.
Million Dollar Beach House is streaming on Netflix.
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Was expecting the movie to be good :/